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Baby Boomers and Male Menopause

Something happened to our parents during and proceeding World War Two. They could have had the world's longest party, but instead they lost their minds and had more kids than the world had ever seen before. Not just the Americans, but the English as well went nappy-happy. What were they thinking? Any parent can tell you that when a crowd of kids gets together, there's bound to be trouble.

While on the other side of the Atlantic was opening with "Hope I die before I get old", the West Coast was anteing up with "Fire all of your guns at once and explode into space." Ah, yes! Youth and their flirtations with mortality! What a party that was. You can pick out all kinds of fond tableaux, backwards down memory lane and into the future.

Then, just as the kids were going off to college and you were getting ready to sail round the world or trip around all the famous golf courses in Scotland, something happened. It isn't like it hadn't happened before, once and a while after a bit too much to drink, or a bit too much of "nod, nod, wink, wink, say no more."

The Old Fella, in so many words, refused to stand: but this time there wasn't the excess of partying. And it felt different, too. Instead of the "I won't," it was more like "I can't." It, needless to say, put a damper on the evening, and drove you into the doctor's office the next morning.

The doc explained this was male menopause, and he had quite a story to tell. It seems that all the way back when you were thirty, knee deep in leisure suits, when everything was disco and "nod, nod, wink, wink, say no more," your testicles were planning a little subversion. They weren't quite making enough of the old testosterone as they had been before. In fact, it was only a one percent dip. Every year, they would drop your level another percent. You had no idea what was going on. True, the hairline might have receded a bit, your waistline might have increased an inch or two, and maybe you've been a bit depressed lately, but what parent of teenagers doesn't get depressed? The doc explained that when your hormones are out of balance, hair thinning, weight gain, and depression are common side effects. He said that he would do some tests to make sure that nothing else was causing your symptoms and if everything was okay, he could prescribe you some hormone replacement therapy, or HRT, which was, in so many words, testosterone. 

The test that the doctor had in mind was a blood draw, and that old crowd pleaser, the latex glove. Through all the tests you try to remember how frightened you were last night, so as not to freak out as the needle and the glove got nearer and nearer…

Score another point for the Boomers! A little testosterone therapy, healthier eating, a bit more exercise, and monitoring by the doctor; a happier healthier Boomer. He may be too old to rock and roll now, but he sure can disco!